Glimmers
May 27, 2009
“Through some moment of beauty or pain, some sudden turning of our lives, we catch glimmers of at least what the saints are blinded by…” (Frederick Buechner, Listening To Your Life, p. 169)
Rut n. 1. A sunken track or groove made by the passage of vehicles. 2. A habitual, or unvaried way of living or acting.
I am a creature of habit. You probably are as well. My morning routines are, well, routine. I awake to either the coffee pot at 5:27 or the alarm at 5:30. I feed the cats, get coffee for my wife and myself. I do some reading, take a walk, exercise a bit and get ready for work. I drive to work and park in the same parking space almost every day. When I do park in a different spot I will most likely walk past my car in the afternoon, headed for where it usually is parked. Lately, as I alluded to in my last Glimmers, I’ve been in a rut.
Even the most exciting things can become routine as you repeat them over and over in the same way. They can become unconscious activities performed with all the animation of a creature from Night of the Living Dead. Ruts are comfortable. And that’s the problem. It has been said that a rut is just a grave with both ends knocked out. Ruts rob life of excitement. To maintain our sanity and joy, I think we need to be challenged and stretched every now and then. So if you’re tired of the “same old, same old,” break out! Take a class in dancing, photography, ancient history, or Aikido (like me). Visit a state park you’ve never seen. Or, horror of horrors, sit in a different seat at worship! Doing something new, or doing something you do often in a different way, can change your perspective and restore some lost joy to your life.
Blessings to you all,
Jerald
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Because I have to!
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men,since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward."
(Paul, Colossians 3:23-24)
People say they enjoy Glimmers and I say that I enjoy writing them. At least half of that statement has not been true lately. The last half. The frequency of my Glimmers posts have declined markedly. In reflecting on the "why," I came across this passage in Colossians. It is all about the motivation, the "heart" reasons for our actions.
My motivation for Glimmers has gotten skewed. It has become a task on my calendar. My calendar alarm pops up and says "Glimmers" and I resent it. It has fallen into the "your term paper is due on Wednesday" trap. I have been reduced from doing it because I want to, to doing it because I have to and because other people expect me to. How sad! No wonder I can't find any inspiration.
Why do we do what we do? Why do we work? Because we want to, or because we have to? Why do we give healing and compassionate care to our patients? Because we want to, or because we have to? Or do we do it as Erie Chapman suggests, because that's our "Mother" in that bed?
So I'm taking Glimmers of my "to do" list. My calendar won't bug me to get it done. We'll see what happens. If I were a betting man, I'm not, but if I were, I'd bet that I'm about to make a scientific discovery about the brain. I strongly suspect that the distance in my mind between "have to" and "want to" is one synapse.
Blessings to you all,
Jerald
(Paul, Colossians 3:23-24)
People say they enjoy Glimmers and I say that I enjoy writing them. At least half of that statement has not been true lately. The last half. The frequency of my Glimmers posts have declined markedly. In reflecting on the "why," I came across this passage in Colossians. It is all about the motivation, the "heart" reasons for our actions.
My motivation for Glimmers has gotten skewed. It has become a task on my calendar. My calendar alarm pops up and says "Glimmers" and I resent it. It has fallen into the "your term paper is due on Wednesday" trap. I have been reduced from doing it because I want to, to doing it because I have to and because other people expect me to. How sad! No wonder I can't find any inspiration.
Why do we do what we do? Why do we work? Because we want to, or because we have to? Why do we give healing and compassionate care to our patients? Because we want to, or because we have to? Or do we do it as Erie Chapman suggests, because that's our "Mother" in that bed?
So I'm taking Glimmers of my "to do" list. My calendar won't bug me to get it done. We'll see what happens. If I were a betting man, I'm not, but if I were, I'd bet that I'm about to make a scientific discovery about the brain. I strongly suspect that the distance in my mind between "have to" and "want to" is one synapse.
Blessings to you all,
Jerald
Friday, May 1, 2009
Welcome to my country!
This past Tuesday I attended the 16th Annual Hospice Foundation of America Teleconference. The topic this year was “Diversity and End of Life Care.” It was well done, informative and helpful. It emphasized the importance of respect for cultures other than our own and encouraged curiosity. It recommended inviting others to be our teachers about how they understand the world, their illness, and how they make meaning of it all. It was good advice.
As I often do with such things, I went off on a couple of tangents from the original intent of the teleconference. First I reflected on my own family system. All three of my daughters have now married. Accepting and welcoming new members to the family is an intentional exercise in cross-cultural communication.
My sons-in -law all come from differing family cultures and regional cultures and it has sometimes seemed as if they are aliens from a foreign country. Jessie’s husband, Josh, is a prime example. Every now and then he comes out with something that causes me to shake me head and go “What?”
Josh is as good-hearted a person as you’ll ever meet. He is American, Caucasian, Christian, and English speaking so you’d think understanding him should be easy for me. It is, most of the time. But every now and then, I just don’t get him. The same is true of the other sons-in-law to varying degrees.
The teleconference gave me an idea. What if I thought of Josh as someone from a foreign country? Then I wouldn’t be surprised when I didn’t get something he said or did that seemed foreign to me, but was in alignment with his regional and family culture. He is, after all, from New Hampshire. It’s like a foreign country. I told him when he did or said something that seemed odd to me, I’d say, “He’s frum the Noth, he cain’t hep it!” We all laughed. But he got it. Later in the conversation, he said “Well, in my country…” and the laughter started again.
Reflecting further, I think there are striking similarities to adding new family members and adding new members to our Parrish Medical Center team. We too have a distinct culture that may be foreign to some. Helping them understand it and become acclimated to it is an exercise in cultural competence. It requires respect and curiosity from us all. Accepting new family members as family is a sign of good family health, at home, and at work. So the next time you have the opportunity to welcome someone to your family, or to your work team, you could say, “Welcome to my country!”
Blessings to you all,
Jerald
As I often do with such things, I went off on a couple of tangents from the original intent of the teleconference. First I reflected on my own family system. All three of my daughters have now married. Accepting and welcoming new members to the family is an intentional exercise in cross-cultural communication.
My sons-in -law all come from differing family cultures and regional cultures and it has sometimes seemed as if they are aliens from a foreign country. Jessie’s husband, Josh, is a prime example. Every now and then he comes out with something that causes me to shake me head and go “What?”
Josh is as good-hearted a person as you’ll ever meet. He is American, Caucasian, Christian, and English speaking so you’d think understanding him should be easy for me. It is, most of the time. But every now and then, I just don’t get him. The same is true of the other sons-in-law to varying degrees.
The teleconference gave me an idea. What if I thought of Josh as someone from a foreign country? Then I wouldn’t be surprised when I didn’t get something he said or did that seemed foreign to me, but was in alignment with his regional and family culture. He is, after all, from New Hampshire. It’s like a foreign country. I told him when he did or said something that seemed odd to me, I’d say, “He’s frum the Noth, he cain’t hep it!” We all laughed. But he got it. Later in the conversation, he said “Well, in my country…” and the laughter started again.
Reflecting further, I think there are striking similarities to adding new family members and adding new members to our Parrish Medical Center team. We too have a distinct culture that may be foreign to some. Helping them understand it and become acclimated to it is an exercise in cultural competence. It requires respect and curiosity from us all. Accepting new family members as family is a sign of good family health, at home, and at work. So the next time you have the opportunity to welcome someone to your family, or to your work team, you could say, “Welcome to my country!”
Blessings to you all,
Jerald
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